Well okay, so there's this increasing sense of futility as the "rock" rolls back once more, putting me in the same place.
But am I doomed? Are most people doomed when it comes to their self-defeating choices?
What if virtually all of what we think of as "happiness" is tied to our energy, life force, and sense of optimism for what's to come?
Isn't that mostly tied to our health? And isn't our health linked to our choices? And aren't many of our "choices" tied to instincts that are hard-wired? So... is our "lizard brain" in control? How can we override that strong force and gain the upper hand?
I am going to look at this some more... I've been reading The End of Overeating and The Full Plate Diet, which has already given me some good tools. I know it's mostly a case of cognitive re-wiring, rather than something simple like my lack of willpower. I'm about to get the i diet to train myself to crave salads, and I'm going to listen to my audio book The Beck diet solution, to train my brain to think like a thin person. (That's a little frustrating for me, because I used to think like a thin person, back when I was thin! Huh. Weird. What happened?)
Alright, I'm not the only one this happened to. I am not alone. That should provide some comfort. I have gone to support meetings (WW, mostly), but they can only take me so far. Knowing others have the same issues just makes me want to "solve" this even more, for the happiness of all humanity!
Ahhh... if the very act of acquiring a book could solve such problems!
Well, it's a new day, and new books are on their way. Here I go again... urg... grunt, grunt...
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